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Yo mama is so fat that you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through!

Yo mama is so fat that she looks like she`s smuggling a Volkswagon!

Yo mama is so stupid that she sent me a fax with a stamp on it.

Yo mama is so stupid that when she saw a Wrong Way sign in her rearview mirror, she turned around.

Yo mama is so stupid that she was born on Independence Day and can`t remember her birthday.

Yo mama is so ugly that she gives Freddy Kreuger nightmares.

Yo mama is like a library, she`s open to the public.

Yo mama is so stupid that she stopped at a stop sign and waited for it to say go.

Yo mama is so fat that she canít even jump to a conclusion.

Yo mama is so fat that she went on a light diet. As soon as itís light she starts eating.

Yo mama is so old that she called the cops when David and Goliath started to fight.

Yo mama is so lazy that she thinks a two-income family is where yo daddy has two jobs.

Yo mama is so stupid that she went to the store to buy a color TV and asked what colors they had.

Yo mama is so stupid that you have to dig for her IQ!

Yo mama is so stupid that she sat in a tree house because she wanted to be a branch manager.

Yo mama`s so bald that I can tell fortunes on her head.

Yo mama is like a basketball hoop, everybody gets a shot.

Yo mama is so fat that when you get on top of her your ears pop.

Yo mama is like the sun, look at her too long and you`ll go blind.

Yo mama is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror, the reflection looks back and shakes its head.