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Q: What do you call a cat who eats lemons? - A: A sourpuss!
Why do little boys whine? Because they're practicing to be men.
Q: How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb? A: None. The piano player can do that with his left hand.
Teacher: What came after the stone age and the bronze age? Pupil: The sausage!
What do bees do if they want to use public transport ? Wait at a buzz stop !
"And how's yer wife, Pat?" "Sure, she do be awful sick." "Is ut dangerous she is?" "No, she's too weak t' be dangerous anymore!"
Knock Knock Who's there ! Bully ! Bully who ? Bully Jean is not my lover !
Come here, you greedy wretch. I'll teach you to eat all your sister's birthday chocs. It's all right Dad, I know how !
What will a monster eat in a restaurant? The waiter.
I spent the whole evening knotsurfing! Don't you mean netsurfing? No, everyone was complaining because I tied the computer up for ages!