Facebook ready sharing content, easy to post to pages, profiles and more. Share quotes on twitter and Facebook. Find content sayings, thoughts, quotes and more for sharing on social media platforms like Facebook, Twitter and others. Select the category you want to view. Random content will be displayed or enter a term to search within our system. Get code and more to share on Social media. Full Facebook intergrated, sahre with friends. Comeback daily for new content. Do you have a quote you want to share, a joke you want to share please submit your content.
Why did the vampire baby stop having baby food? He wanted something to get his teeth into.
Knock Knock Who's there ! Amber ! Amber who ? Amber-sting to come in !
Golfer: "This golf is a funny game." Caddy: "It's not supposed to be."
Doctor, doctor, I feel so short! No problem. Hop up on the couch.
First Cannibal: "Have you seen the dentist?" Second Cannibal: "Yes, he filled my teeth at dinner time."
Apologising Made Simple by Thayer Thorry
Teacher: You aren't paying attention to me. Are you having trouble hearing? Pupil: No, teacher I'm having trouble listening!
During my stay at an expensive hotel in New York City, I woke up in the middle of the night with an upset stomach. I called room service and ordered some soda crackers. When I looked at the charge slip, I was furious. I called room service and raged, "I know I'm in a luxury hotel, but $11.50 for six crackers is ridiculous!" "The crackers are complimentary," the voice to the other end cooly explained. "I believe you are complaining about your room number."
A pious man who had reached the age of 105 suddenly stopped going to synagogue. Alarmed by the old fellow's absence after so many years of faithful attendance the Rabbi went to see him. He found him in excellent health, so the Rabbi asked, "How come after all these years we don't see you at services anymore?" The old man looked around and lowered his voice. "I'll tell you, Rabbi," he whispered. "When I got to be 90, I expected God to take me any day. But then I got to be 95, then 100, then 105. So I figured that God is very busy and must've forgotten about me, and I don't want to remind Him!"
A priest was walking along the cliffs at Dover when he came upon two locals pulling another man ashore on the end of a rope. "That's what I like to see," said the priest, "A man helping his fellow man." As he was walking away, one local remarked to the other, "Well, he sure doesn't know the first thing about shark fishing."