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Q: How many Microsoft support staff does it take to change a light bulb? A: Four. One to ask "What is the registration number of the light bulb?", one to ask "Have you tried rebooting it?", another to ask "Have you tried reinstalling it?" and the last one to say "It must be your hardware because the light bulb in our office works fine..."
How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they'd rather keep their clients in the dark.
What do you get if you cross a frog with a ferry ? A hoppercraft !
Why did the pioneers cross the country in covered wagons ? Because they didn't want to wait 40 years for a train !
Clinton goes around telling people we humans are genetically 99.9% similar. Apparently the 0.1% is the character gene.
What happened to the man who owned a riding academy? Business kept falling off!
Is there a way to make a hamburger do the Hula? Sure, order a burger and a shake!
Q: When does a brunette have 1/2 of a brain? A: After a dye job.
How does Dracula keep fit? He plays batminton.
Stan: I won 92 goldfish. Fred: Where are you going to keep them ? Stan: In the bathroom Fred: But what will you do when you want to take a bath ? Stan: Blindfold them !