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Q. How did Adam and Eve feel when expelled from the Garden of Eden? A. They were really put out.
Teacher: What's 2 and 2 Pupil: 4 Teacher: That's good Pupil: Good ?, that's perfect !
Why did the pig wear yellow coveralls? He split a seam in his blue ones.
Why did the blonde burn her ear? The phone rang while she was ironing!
How does a monster begin a fairy tale? "Once upon a slime . . ."
What's a zombie say when he gets a letter from his girlfriend? It's a dead letter day.
Doctor, Doctor I feel like a sheep. That's baaaaaaaaaad!
Which book makes prudish Gorillas blush? The Naked Ape!
An Irish priest and a Rabbi get into a car accident. They both get out of their cars and stumble over to the side of the road. The Rabbi says, "Oy vey! What a wreck!" The priest asks him, "Are you all right, Rabbi?" The Rabbi responds, "Just a little shaken." The priest pulls a flask of whiskey from his coat and says, "Here, drink some of this it will calm your nerves." The Rabbi takes the flask and drinks it down and says, "Well, what are we going to tell the police?" "Well," the priest says, "I don't know what your aft' to be tellin' them. But I'll be tellin' them I wasn't the one drinkin'."
Q. Why do blondes have more fun? A. They are easier to keep amused.